There’s a difference between accepting and tolerating your partner. When you accept someone, you’re accepting them wholeheartedly, without reservations. You’re not just putting up with them because you have to, but because you genuinely see the value in them. On the other hand, when you tolerate someone, it’s usually because you’ve decided that the bad outweighs the good. You’re putting up with their faults and imperfections because you don’t want to be alone, or because you think it’s better than being with someone else.
So how can you tell if you’re accepting or tolerating your partner?
Here are a few signs:
You’re always trying to change them
If you’re constantly trying to change your partner, it’s a sign that you’re not accepting them for who they are. Whether it’s their appearance, their personality, or their
You’re never really happy
If you find yourself always nitpicking and complaining, it’s a sign that you’re not truly happy with your partner. You might be tolerating them because you don’t want to be alone, or because you think they’re the best you can do. But if you’re not really happy, it’s not worth it in the long run.
You’re always comparing them to others
If you find yourself constantly comparing your partner to others, it’s a sign that you’re not accepting them for who they are. You might be comparing them to an ex, or to someone you see as perfect. But the fact is, no one is perfect. Everyone has their own flaws and imperfections. If you can’t accept your partner for who they are, then it’s not a healthy relationship.
You don’t really know them
If you find yourself always asking your partner questions, or trying to get to know them better, it’s a sign that you don’t really know them. This is usually because you’re not accepting them for who they are. You might be tolerating them because you don’t want to be alone, or because you think they’re the best you can do. But if you’re not really getting to know them, it’s not a healthy relationship.
Lack of Communication
If you find yourself not really communicating with your partner, it’s a sign that you’re not accepting them for who they are. You might be tolerating them because you don’t want to be alone, or because you think they’re the best you can do. But if you’re not communicating, it’s not a healthy relationship.
Signs That You Accept Your Partner
On the other hand, here are a few signs that you’re accepting your partner:
- You don’t try to change them.
- You see them as an equal.
- You’re not afraid to show them your vulnerable side.
- You’re comfortable with their imperfections.
- You accept them wholeheartedly, without reservations.
If you find that you’re tolerating your partner more than accepting them, it might be time to reassess your relationship. Are they really worth your time and energy? Or would you be better off without them? Only you can answer that question.
It’s important to be accepting of your partner because it creates a stronger, more lasting bond between you. When you’re accepting of someone, it means that you truly see them and appreciate them for who they are. On the other hand, tolerating someone often leads to resentment and frustration. Over time, this can chip away at the relationship until there’s nothing left.
If you’re not sure whether you’re accepting or tolerating your partner, ask yourself how you feel when you’re with them. Do you feel good about yourself? Or do you find yourself constantly comparing yourself to them and coming up short?
If it’s the latter, it might be time to move on.